Friday, June 27, 2008
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Last night around 1:00 I had to let Pinky out as usual, and then I went to the bathroom where there is a window.
I could hear a ruckus outside and didn't think anything about it and then went back to bed. Pinky was still outside, which was not unusual.
I went back to sleep....only to wake up at 3:00 AM and there was no Pinky in bed.....What the hell?
The minute I started looking for him, I could feel something amiss.....there was a feeling in the air of thick suspense.
I step out on to the staircase....quiet....but I could hear a little russelling sound, enough to let me know that there is life down there, but all was not right.
I gingerly tip toe to the edge of the stairs and look down, and in the dark I can see Pinky's curled tail....but wait, something is not right, because I also see this black blob, and I'm not sure what it is.
I then turn on the light.....O NO!
There was a dead possum, and Pinky was standing guard over his kill.
PINKY! I said with horror.
My little dog, a cold blood murder....ugggggggg
Pinky...GET UP HERE! I said in disgust, and he comes trotting up to the bedroom.
I get back into bed, but not Pinky, he was juiced from the kill. wound up, pacing, jumping up and then down, and making a little mewing sound. I know he wanted to go gloat over his treasure.
I couldn't get back to sleep because I knew the animal was laying dead downstairs, and I knew I was going to have to clean up blood and guts (although Pinky was clean as a whistle).
I tip toe out of the room with Pinky on my heals.......I then locked him in the room so he would not continue with the kill....
I walked down the stairs......
No possum! The place where the animal had been laying (on its back) was empty!
It had been playing dead for Pinky for at least two hours while Daisy Girl and I were sleeping.
Pinky is still plexed and continues to look for his possum....I think he believes that I somehow stole his road kill because he looks at me with accusation while continuing the search for his treasure.
Posted by Holly Mead at 5:04 AM
Sunday, June 15, 2008
I don't know why I thought I could do something like this.....
...because I can't ever remember words to songs, and I have always been that way. I have a really keen memory for everything else but not a song.
So here we are in this small group of eclectic people, and it all seemed so simple. They were chants that we were to sing as we did some sort of folk dancing.
We were suppose to look at that other person and acknowledge their spirit or something along that line. (yawn)
O crap, I know I looked like a total retard, because I was so busy trying to remember the words to the songs that I couldn't get the little twirls right...and believe me they were not hard. Not to mention that when I do sing, I make my dogs howl, so.......
I'm pretty sure I f----ked up the circle!
So much for my spiritual future.
Posted by Holly Mead at 12:34 PM
Friday, June 13, 2008
I haven't posted about the growth of PawHealer because I have been bone tired. But tonight when I came home and checked my orders....
I had to sit back and I had to take note.....and I had to let it settle in.....
This little business is now doing $4k per week. That is $16K per month, and a run rate of $192K a year.
Sometimes I post about the negative things I feel, well tonight I'm posting about a great sense of satisfaction....and a feeling of gratitude.
Ahhhhhh to feel like I have found my way, for the first time , to feel as if it is just right, and to feel like it is something real, and not going to slip away like a mirage.
For that I am happy and and for that I am thankful that for the first time in my adult life, I can see....
Posted by Holly Mead at 8:37 PM
Thursday, June 12, 2008
I'm feeling like I'm in a rut, so when one of my patients asked me to go to this whatever it is...I said yes.
Hmmmm...I don't do yoga, I don't meditate, I'm not into Goddess, (whatever that is)...I wonder how long I will last.
But who knows, maybe it will be fun. God knows I could use some peace........
the second Saturday of every month
A spiritual practice to open your heart. Simple
circle dances using sacred phrases from the wisdom
traditions of the world. Everyone is welcome.
No experience needed.
Optional meditation 7:00pm. Dance meeting 7:30pm.
Suggested donation $ 8
Christ Lutheran Church Pacific Beach
4761 Cass St., San Diego
Call Louise 619
Posted by Holly Mead at 7:57 PM
Saturday, June 7, 2008
I'm always thinking of writing to my blog.....but it seems as if there is not much ever to post.
But I have been having an inkling of a thought...and it bothers me.
It seems that no matter where I'm standing in life.....its never good enough.
Those childhood voices that live in the back of my head provide me with a daily litany of critique.
"I'm too fat'
"I'm not growing my business fast enough"
"The house is old and broken down and ugly " (its actually very beautiful...just needs some work)
"Noone would ever find me attractive again"
These voices have lived with me my entire life.
They come from the days of my father and mother.....hate to lay it on them, because I am 52.....but from the time I can remember, nothing was ever good enough for them...it was just not me, it was the way that they lived their life, and it has been past on to me.
Of course I have seen a therapist....Who would want to live with those nasty little voices....but it didn't work. Maybe I just didn't work hard enough to get rid of them.
I don't know....but they wear me down, and they make me feel like I can't live in the moment.
My life is a constant tread mill of trying to get to somewhere that when I arrive is never good enough.
It makes me sad.
Posted by Holly Mead at 6:14 AM